If you were to hop online and Google some quotes on relationships, one that you might happen to see is “Never make someone a priority when they consider you to be an option.” Although this is a pearl of wisdom that can easily be applied in just about every facet of life, it’s especially important to consider when you’re dating someone.
In fact, if you happened to speak with a professional matchmaker who worked for a company like Tawkify, before going on your first date with one of their (other) clients, one of the things they would probably ask you is if you’re looking for a serious commitment. That way, they can connect you with someone who is not merely interested in “meeting new people” but in meeting the one they feel they can truly build a future with.
But whether you choose to use a professional service to assist you with your dating needs or you would prefer to try dating “the old-fashioned way”, just remember that your time and emotions are truly valuable.
And because we think it’s important to be in the kind of relationship you desire, we wanted to share with you some of the signs that someone is truly making you a priority in their life---rather than seeing you as one option out of a sea of many.
Pay attention to how you meet them. One of the best things about using a professional matchmaking service is you can find someone who is on the same page as you are. Meaning, if you want to be married, they’ll pair you up with someone who feels the same way. On the other hand, if you meet someone on a dating app like Tinder or PlentyOfFish, it’s a toss-up what their intentions are beyond a couple of dates and “a good time”. So, if you want to be treated like a priority, pay attention to how the relationship starts. It’s important.
Pay attention to how often you see them. Have you ever heard the quote “If they like you, you’ll know it but if they don’t, you’ll be confused”? There’s a lot of wisdom that comes with that saying. When someone really likes you, it’s not about if they have time to see you. It’s all about them making the time. It’s about them figuring out how to talk to you on the phone and spend quality time with you, no matter how demanding their schedule is. In short, if you hear from them a couple of times per week (at least), they’re at least trying to make you a priority. On the other hand, if it’s every couple of weeks…yeah, you’re probably an option.
Pay attention to how they treat you. When you’re in a relationship with someone, they should make you feel special. While there are different ways to do that, the point is that you should never feel unappreciated, taken for granted or, even worse, disposable. You know, like you’re easy to let go of because there are so many other people to date. You are unique. You are original. And that makes you incomparable. Anyone who is truly worth your time is going to see this about you and treat you like you are not just someone they know, but someone they are lucky to know.
Pay attention to how they introduce you. For the first few dates (the first four or five), if you and your date happen to run into someone that they know, you honestly shouldn’t expect more than “This is (insert your name here).” But once you’ve started to spend a significant amount of time together, listen for if there are any “extra words” that are added. If things like “special friend” or “close friend” or eventually “boyfriend” or “girlfriend” are used, then you know that the relationship is more than casual. If after a few months, there’s…nothing, it’s time to have a chat about if there really is a potential of the relationship turning into something.
Pay attention to what they say to you. A huge mistake that people tend to make in relationships is not really listening to what the other person has to say. And when it comes to this particular topic, if someone says “I really just want to be friends” or “I’m not interested in anything serious right now” or “Yeah, marriage is not something that I see in the foreseeable future”, that is just what they mean. In these instances, there’s no real need for them to make you a priority because a serious relationship is not a priority for them. If this is the case, it’s up to you to decide where to go from here. If you want to make them a priority, an option or if you want to end the relationship altogether. However it all plays out, remember that you deserve to have what you want in a relationship. And ultimately, we support your decision. Either way.