So, you’re contemplating using a professional matchmaker in hopes of finding the love of your life. But here’s the thing: A part of the reason why dating has not worked for you in the past is because, well, you don’t really like dating.
So, is it safe to say that you’re already excited about reading this article being that you probably thought you were the only one who feels that way? The reality is that although there are a lot of benefits that come with taking the traditional dating route, at the same time, we get that there are some people who feel like the whole concept of dating can sometimes feel a bit “forced” and “routine”. And so, they’d prefer something to happen more organically than always planning something to do.
If you fit that bill, we have good news and we also have a reality check. Let’s go with the reality check first: Unless you’re going to start seeing someone you already know, you’re going to need to get at least a couple of dates out of the way. But once you’ve been on about three and you and the person you’ve been seeing have discovered that you’re both on the same page when it comes to the whole “dating scene”, here are some ways to date each other…without actually dating.
Cook at home. Did you know there are studies which cite that cooking together is not only healthier, but can literally help to improve your relationship? That’s because when you’re doing things with someone you care about, without any distractions, it helps you to feel so much more connected to them. And that can ultimately lead to a happier kind of relationship overall.
Find a mutual hobby. Something else that can be a lot of fun is to find a hobby that the both of you can do together. It could be taking an art class, going hiking or making pottery. Just make sure that it’s something you both are genuinely interested in. That way, it feels more like a skill that you’re developing while spending a bit of quality time together and not simply an activity to appease one more than the other.
Pitch a tent (indoors). I mean, you can also pitch a tent outside, but if it’s a bit chilly or you’re not the fondest of the critters that roam in the nighttime hours, you can always make a fort indoors too. String some lights, play some music, order some of your favorite food and then lie on top of a few throw pillows until you talk yourself to sleep. It’s romance without a ton of work. (For tips on how to build your own tent, click here).
Learn about each other’s favorite things. You can learn a lot about someone by discovering their favorite foods, favorite music, favorite movies and cities (etc.). So, one night make a point to listen to some of each other’s favorite songs. Another night, go on Netflix or Hulu to see if each other’s favorite movies are available to watch. One weekend, take a road trip. It won’t feel like “dating”. It will feel more like…intimacy.
Be spontaneous. Sitting on the phone on a Thursday, asking each other what you both want to do on a Saturday, can sometimes feel more like an obligation than anything else. If you’re both pretty keen on surprises, put forth the effort to be a bit spontaneous. Get up and go to a festival in the city. Have breakfast food for dinner at a 24-hour café. Stroll along the streets downtown, just because. Dating doesn’t have to feel like work. It’s all about doing what you want…in a way that suits the two of you. Best.