If you’re over the age of 35, you probably remember what it was like to date (as a teenager or young adult) without a cell phone. Ah yes. Back in the days when you only had a landline and if you had wealthy parents, maybe a car phone (and that’s a really big maybe!).
These days, even 10-year-olds have cell phones. Excuse us, smartphones. This basically means that not only are we accessible to everyone who has our phone number at any time of the day or night, but we also have internet access too. This makes it extremely easy to hop onto our Facebook and Instagram (and our dating apps) to see what’s happening at any given moment.
Being that people with smartphones know this about themselves, this means that they also know it about other people who have smartphones too. And that can make for some really interesting dating situations.
So to spare you the potential drama that can come from dating while owning a smartphone, here are five etiquette tips that can come in really handy. (Make sure to put your smartphone on notice.)
Put your phone on vibrate while on a date. It’s (kinda) funny how many of us will overlook two very important features on our smartphones: text and voicemail. Look, just because someone calls you, that doesn’t mean that you have to answer. If it’s an emergency, they’ll probably send a text about what’s going on. If not, they can leave a voicemail and you can get back to them---once your date is over. Constantly answering calls during a date sends an awful message that your date is not a top priority. And you don’t want to do that because it’s pretty hard to cozy up to a smartphone at night. Yeah, if you simply can’t imagine leaving your phone in your car, at least leave it on vibrate.
Step away from the social media alerts. If your smartphone is set to where you constantly receive alerts from your social media accounts, turn those off while you’re on a date too. Your mom making your favorite dinner, taking a picture of it and posting it on Instagram or your friend sending you some random Snapchat of someone they met in a bar can wait. There are studies which indicate that people spend as much as 16 minutes of each hour on their social media accounts. Nothing (NO-THING) is that important on your Facebook or Twitter. Post your dating selfie right at the end of your date. Everything else can wait until you get home.
Be aware of your social media accounts. One thing about smartphones is people can find out a whole lot (and we mean, a whole lot) about you in less than an hour. They can Google you. They can check your Facebook and Instagram. They can go to dating apps like Tinder, Loveflutter, Coffee Meets Bagel or countless others to see if you have an account. That said, remember that dates are a lot like job interviews and people you are dating are a lot like employers. So, if there’s something on your accounts that would paint you in not the best kind of light, either delete it or bring it up on your date. You don’t owe them an explanation but trust us, coming from you, it would certainly be appreciated. And more times than not, will work in your favor too.
Respond to texts in a timely fashion. Here’s a tip for after the date is over. If you’re interested in things going to another level with the person you are dating, nothing sends the complete opposite message like not responding to their text(s). That’s not to say that you have to reply immediately. But if after the date, they send a text that night to say they had a good time, try and reply before retiring for the evening. And at the very least, by noon the next day. And whatever you do, don’t let more than 24 hours go by. Ignored texts are rude, plain and simple. Plus, it only takes like 30 seconds to a minute (depending on how fast you type) to say “Thanks. I had an awesome time too!”
Use your smartphone to actually (get this) make phone calls! Yes, we’re yelling out this particular point because a professional matchmaker, a relationship coach and shoot, even your grandmother would tell you that if you only text your date, sooner or later, that’s going to become a problem. An author by the name of Ruthie Dean penned a book a couple of years ago entitled Real Men Don’t Text: A New Approach to Dating. OK, that’s a bit extreme but we certainly get her point. It’s ironic that cell phones were invented to make calls and now it’s one of the last things that they’re used to do. Even in this ever- evolving technological age, people still want to feel like they’re making a connection. For this reason, don’t let a week go by without actually dialing the person you’re dating’s number. It’s the courteous and “I’m-over-16-now” thing to do.