So, it’s been a while since you’ve been a really great date, let alone been in a really good relationship. And as much as your friends have tried to put their best foot forward with blind dates, unfortunately, things have not gone as well for you (or them) as hoped. And although you’ve heard talk show hosts recommend that you should just wait for the Universe to have someone walk up to you at a grocery store or at the gym, you’re starting to get a bit cynical about those “pearls of wisdom”.
As a result, you start wondering more and more about if online dating or hiring a professional matchmaking service is the route that you should personally take. After all, reportedly over 40 million people have tried online dating before and there are currently over 2,000 professional matchmakers within the United States who are willing to give you that “personal touch”. Clearly this is evidence that you would not be alone or “weird” or “desperate” if you decided to give either one of them a try.
But before you sign up on Match or eHarmony or you hit up a professional matchmaking service, we thought it would be a good idea to take some of the guesswork (or apprehension or fear) of both options by sharing with you some of the pros and cons that come with using both.
Let’s start with online dating first…
The Pros of Online Dating
When it comes to the benefits of online dating, there are several. For one thing, being that you are able to see someone’s profile before you actually meet them, you’re able to see how they look and also learn a significant amount about them before ever making initial contact. Another plus that comes with online dating is you can take things slow. Meaning, you can shoot them an email or opt to Skype with them before physically going out. That way, if you realize that you’re not as interested as you initially thought, there’s no pressure. This brings us to another thing that’s pretty awesome about online dating: it brings a whole new meaning to “there’s plenty of fish in the sea”. That’s because there are several sites with literally hundreds people on them. So, if it doesn’t work out with one, there’s always (ALWAYS) others.
The Cons of Online Dating
With all of those pros that we just mentioned, it’s hard to believe that there could possibly be cons, right? There are a few, though. For instance, with online dating, you really need to research the sites before signing up. Without question, some have a better reputation, an easier site to navigate and a lot more quality control than others. Something else to consider is you can never be 100 percent certain that the person’s profile information is accurate. It’s not uncommon for folks to post an old picture of themselves, to “fudge” (eh hem, lie) about their looks, education or interest or to even “catfish” someone. Another con is sometimes online dating takes the fun out of…dating. When you’re on a blind date or you’re set up through a professional matchmaker (which we’ll get to in just a moment), there’s some anticipation and excitement that comes with wondering who you’re going to meet. With online dating? Yeah…not so much.
The Pros of a Professional Matchmaker Service
Hands down, one of the best things about going with a professional matchmaker service is the fact that they tend to take a more personal, hands-on approach to finding the one. They are literally invested in you and what you are looking for. With a professional matchmaking service, there is one person who is qualified in asking the right questions to match you up with someone who is beyond a good first date. That’s because they want to place you with someone you can have a healthy and happy long-term relationship with. Plus, although their pool may not be as large as some online dating sites are, that’s because they tend to be more selective. That works in your favor because they are able to screen the individuals before you ever come into contact with them. So the whole “You’re not who I thought you were” thing is usually totally avoided. Another bonus is if the first (or second) date doesn’t work out, a professional matchmaker service doesn’t take the “Oh well, thanks for playing” approach. They are willing to keep working with you as long as you’re committed to the process and requirements that come with using a professional matchmaker. With this kind of service, they tend to feel more like a friend which prevents you from feeling so much like a client. That helps you to relax, build trust and actually enjoy the matchmaking experience.
The Cons of a Professional Matchmaking Service
Although there are a couple, there really aren’t a ton of cons. Probably the biggest disadvantage is the price. There’s no way around the fact that some of them are two to five times more than the fee to sign up for an online dating membership. But there are services like Tawkify that are pretty comparable and can still provide really great dates and matches. So, when it comes to the price, our recommendation is just to do a lot of research to see who has the best reputation. Don’t be hesitant to ask for referrals either. Another thing to think about is that reputable companies may not be in your city. This means that while you can use a service to connect you with someone, you might find yourself in a long distance situation until one of you can get to each other’s city. And then there’s the fact that you might end up not finding anyone, even though you spent money in order to do so. But with love, there are always risks, right?
As you can see, as with most things in life, there is a lot to consider when it comes to both options. It’s all about knowing what you’re looking for, how much time and money you want to invest and if you’re willing to stick with the process in order to get what you want. But at least now, hopefully you know what to expect with both. We’re rooting for you to make the best choice for you.